I have been pondering over the topic https://anaturistworld.com/forums/topic/290/circumcised and also considering topics like these https://anaturistworld.com/forums/topic/217/unwelcome-simply-because-you-are-male and https://anaturistworld.com/forums/topic/208/gender-equality and https://anaturistworld.com/forums/topic/206/segregation-or-integration
And it has me wondering why does it appear that naturists (and the world) are always thinking of men as predators, and women as vulnerable? Why are we always talking about naturism helping women find their confidence, accept their bodies and taking "journeys" but seldom consider that men also need to find confidence, accept their bodies and take their own journeys.
I wrote about my own take on learning to accept myself in this blog https://anaturistworld.com/member-blog/45831 and I know that I am not alone among the gender that is not know as the "fairer sex." The half that is not known as "the better half."
OK. I am not going to suggest that women have not suffered at the hands of men in one way or another other the years. Men have sexualised them, have abused them, have had more power, had the vote for longer and earned more money. Some men are womanisers, they are wife beaters, they do come home from the pub and expect the dinner on the table and/or expect their conjugal rights and will get nasty if not given it. But as Joe E Brown says to Jack Lemmon at the end of Some Like It Hot when Jack tells him he is a man "Nobody's Perfect."
And women have their tough and cruel side too. Men can be bullied, men can have their hearts broken, men can be mistreated, controlled and maneuvered. I for one have been a victim of a cruel and vicious woman. Both emotionally and physically abused and the fact that I knew I was stronger than her made it in some ways worse. If I had hit back I would have been the bully despite her behaviour, part of her strength lay in the power she had over me because "men cannot hit women."
How does this all fit into naturism? Women seem to be held on a pedestal in naturism. They are welcomed with open arms and encouraged and even craved! Men on the other hand often seem mistrusted, unwelcome and basically treated like a second class citizen.
Article after article, promotion after promotion, event after event encourage us to feel this way. Women need a safe place away from men. Men cannot be trusted. Women are vulnerable, full of feelings, full of insecurities and questions about themselves. In need of pampering, protection and special attention. Naturism can do women good, but only if they are kept safe from men and allowed to nurture the idea of nudity with a supportive female environment where other women can reassure them that they are not too fat and their breasts aren't too small. The opposite picture is painted about men. They have no such worries, they are tough, confident, comfortable with themselves, pests, wolves, unable to keep themselves under control, the sole source of damage to naturism's reputation. Men are trusted when accompanied by a woman, who can vouch for their behaviour and keep them in check. It is a negative picture that discourages women from taking part in naturism, discourages families, discourages men and discourages couples. Maybe it can encourage a handful of women looking to increase their body confidence, but how do they find naturism? The only way seems to be through a female friend who has found this attitude towards naturism of use to herself. Not through male partners, not through a want for family adventure, not as a way of spending time with the children, not through simply looking for the simple joy of naturism. If you are a woman who has a slight mistrust of men, or a positive hatred, and wants to deal with a dislike of their own body then naturism is for you. An already minority life choice is being forced into a small corner, and we then wonder why we aren't encouraging more women. men, couples and families?
In 1992 the book Men are From Mars and Women are From Venus seemed to highlight the fact that men and women are hugely different and have hugely different needs. I think the message that has been carried from such books and such thoughts has been one of huge inequality. Women's needs are perceived to be of great importance and needing of great attention, where as men's needs are seen as too indulged and of need of being put in their place and ignored. Whatever the intention the outcome is simply more segregation, mistrust, alienation and frustration. Our issues become fundamentally based on basic differences, the book or books like it may as well be called Men Don't Wear Bras and Women Have No Penis, because the message society is currently encouraging is that our differences stem from something as core as basic anatomy and cannot be overcome. The only way for social happiness is mass male castration. Women are basically encouraged to hate men, that is being passed down to the next generation who will then be expected to somehow go out into the world and find love and create a family. Just as children who are told repeatedly not to trust strangers have to at some point work out how to trust them when they leave the home, men and women are asked to believe in each other when the internet, media, parents, school and society and telling them to resent each other.
It would be nice if naturism could see past this mistrust and inequality.
If it could recognise that we are not really that different. That men need love, support, care and nurturing too. That men can be full of self doubt, they can be lonely, they can be hurting, they can worry about their size and shape. That they can be looking for answers within naturism, they can be looking for friendship and companions. That any argument for segregation for women could also be argued for men. But really the strength of naturism, its learning power, its ability to unite and connect and heal society and find true equality comes from proper integration and fair play for all.
How many men are lacking the support and respect they deserve within naturism that is so obviously offered to women? We all have our strengths and we all have or weaknesses is it fair to imagine that men deserve less recognition, less trust and less support? Is it fair to offer a helping hand and welcoming arms to the single woman but make the single man, whose needs may be just as valid and whose strengths and weaknesses just as personal and important, seem unwanted and feel dismissed?
Not everyone in naturism finds naturism to help them heal and find confidence and believe in themselves and their bodies, but those that do can be both men and women and it seems to me that it is time to be a lot more understanding and fairer to men. Society may not be ready to do that but naturism should be. I would love to hear your thoughts. Is it time we stopped imagining that there is such a divide between men and women in who we are, what we need and how we tick? Is it time we started to Get Real and recognise that it is the individual that counts and there are just as many men out there who deserve the trust and support that naturism offers as women, and having different genitals is not a reason to consider that some people should have preferential treatment over others?
at December 30, 2025 11:37 AM GMT 
I also think it's the "Single" person phenomenon that all single males are perving or have bad intentions, please don't tar me with that brush. However, it is hard being accepted at times.
I was at Charco del Palo as your aware, and there where a couple of single men walking around playing with there bits as they would pass, I even chased one.
I got talking to a couple M/F who where staying and this subject came up in conversation as we were having a drink.
There attitude was that naturist resorts were for couples, I asked why is that as I am single I've not paraded around playing with my bits, her answer was woman feel less exposed when couples are around his was naturism is for everyone it doesn't matter who or how you are or your shape; mine is the same from years ago
" I am naked around the home, or on vacation because it's me, it's does not matter who or what you are, naturism has no boundaries".
It's doesn't really bother me what people get up to I have an openmind but don't abuse my space.
It is nice to imagine that the younger generations are more open to naturism. I hope this proves to be true but also hope that if it is a positive side effect of them being more open sexually that they are able to differentiate between the the two things. Naturism is struggling enough to deal with the paranoia that society already carries for it.
I get where a couple is coming from when they feel that naturism is more positive if populated by couples, however it is usually considered that swinging is a "couples" thing so if naturism was promoted as a lifestyle for couples this could also do damage. I ideally don't want to be the only woman or couple at a location, but as longs as there is good behaviour and respect that is the most important thing.
I am remined of this topic and it may be of interest https://anaturistworld.com/forums/topic/145/are-naturists-too-tolerant-and-accepting-for-their-own-good with the last sentence "It's doesn't really bother me what people get up to I have an open-mind but don't abuse my space." For the question of limitations of harm come into play. If for example naturism gets banned on a beach because of the bad behaviour of a small minority in the dunes we are all effected. The users of that beach are effected, the witnesses who reported it are effected, the reputation of naturism is effected and the ability to encourage it to grow and be accepted is effected. The uptake of naturism is effected due to people considering it to not be suitable for them and the increase of bad behaviour is effected, because every time bad behaviour is reported or known of it simply encourages more people to do the same. They simply don't care about naturism and its future they just want their kicks. So we really do have to hope that people do not abuse our space and that space has to be all of naturism all over the globe.
I think we have this idea that couples are safe, that women are safe, but really we have to believe that everyone is safe until the individual or couples show they are not. I had a quick look at porn statistics on the internet and although more men search out porn than women the difference is less than we may imagine.
It has been my experience that men and women equally mistreat each other in many aspects of life. I have worked with both sexes and watched both break down and shed tears over the abusive ways in which they have been treated by their opposite sex partner, I will add here also, I have seen the same behaviour in same sex relationships.
In many ways the textile world has had a huge impact on naturism, I see it all the time, and with things currently in the mindset of people, such as #Metoo, there has been a swing towards greater protections for women. In a sense it is to a degree understandable, men are often much larger and stronger, and so it is easier to identify with a woman who has been badly physically abused. Most men would indeed stand with the woman against the abuser, because men are still raised with that old fashioned notion of, it is a man’s place to protect women.
There can be no denying, when it comes to naturism, men are the bottom of the priorities list unless in a couple or married, and even that is a short term thing, because if they separate, then they immediately fall back into their previous position of that dreaded label of naturism, “Single male”
To a degree, this is conversation that has gone around all of the forums across the whole of the internet for many decades, and as yet, no one has come up with any kind of suitable solution, because the obvious answer would be to arrange all male events. It has been touted and has received a lot of opposition within the ranks of clubs, societies and national organisations who say naturism is for everyone, whilst telling single men they are on a quota.
Steve states: “Men are trusted when accompanied by a woman, who can vouch for their behaviour and keep them in check. It is a negative picture that discourages women from taking part in naturism, discourages families, discourages men and discourages couples.”
Sadly, that is the view of most of naturism, and as we said during our first conversation with Anna and Steve on the Podcast, it feels wrong that in a world that enforces equality, naturism is the only place where there is none. None of us can hide from the fact that naturism discriminates against men in a very big way, there is no valid argument to defend that a lifestyle that promotes itself as “Friendly and For all” actually isn’t.
Civil Society is made up of many organisations, hobbies, clubs and societies, and all follow the rule of equality, diversity and inclusion, and in all of them, there is an acceptable understanding that men are in a greater number. In the dressed world where men are treated with respect, they are welcomed and share spaces and activities with women, and to a degree 99% of the time, there is no problem at all, and we all happily accept that.
It appears to us that the problem within naturism is not men, it is “naked men,” which is somewhat ironic, considering most naturist spend a lot of their time screaming from the roof tops that naturism is “NOT SEXUAL” Unless of course your are a female naturist or organiser, and then men are sexual predators that should be restrained within this so called “none sexual lifestyle” with quotas. One cannot deny, there is a huge contradiction here!
It is confusing and breeds mistrust even more between the sexes, we see women’s only events, family only events, and just about every business, club and society favours only couples, married couples, families and single women, men really do get the thin end of the wedge, almost like a lottery that makes men wait when they apply to join a club or event, as the results are revealed of if the quota has been reached or not. Most of the time the waiting lists are so long, there is no hope for them, and so they sit around forums trying their best, to feel included in a life style that is “not” inclusive.
There is a quote, of which we cannot remember who wrote it, that states: “Women were not created to do everything a man can do, they were created do everything a man cannot do.” We feel there is great wisdom in that quote, because it does highlight something very important, which is, we are meant to work together as one whole.
Currently, exactly as within the textile world, in naturism men outnumber the women, they are the greatest contributors, especially when it comes to things like funding of national organisations, it is not equal, it is the natural biology of the entire human race. Men have no issues paying top support an organisation, and yet these organisations, especially National ones, hammer in the wedges of segregation with supporting quotas for men, and women only events, and it is our humble opinion that it is a direct contradiction of everything that has ever been written or laid down of what naturism is supposed to be.
Naturism is a replication of true nature, it is a way of walking the natural path of life, in the form we were intended to always be, and the gender of a person is relevant within the balance of numbers. Men are women are supposed to be equal, we are supposed to work together, and in the natural scheme of things we are supposed to compliment each other. Naturism no longer allows that, and yet fears the conversations like this one, and is not prepared to sit down and sort all of this out, it is the greatest failure of naturism, and we feel, is the opposite of what naturism should be.
Naturism should be about equality, where everyone is welcome, everyone is natural, and everyone is interacting respectfully. Rin has spent a lot time around single male naturist, one of our greatest naturist friends is a single man, and never once has she encountered anything that has not been completely respectful and free of sexual advances.
Just to conclude, I will add one more point. I worked with many married couples in my time working as a counsellor, and one of the most discussed topics that created friction within the marriage, was the porn consumption of the men. Married couples are seen as acceptable within naturism, and yet if I take the textile world and overlay it onto naturism, the sexualisation of females becomes a much bigger problem within marriages, so do we knowing that, start excluding married males as well?
at December 5, 2025 12:17 PM GMT
Thanks Rob this is true, why should a married man not be a risk, just as why should a single man be a risk.
I think something that Steve and I are have been chatting about partly in relation to the circumcision topic as Steve linked above is that men have their doubts too. As this topic shows men who are not circumcised in some countries have grown up with concerns and men who have been in other countries may also grow up with concerns. They have worries all sorts of body worries are they too thin or too fat, they grow up worrying about being too slight in build, maybe their height, maybe their penis, the list can be pretty endless and maybe in some ways it is tougher than with women. Children born with hypospadias, as Steve was, are now routinely offered counselling as teens.
I think men are judged much more than women, I may be wrong but I feel it is true. At school there are the sporty, muscular boys that are seen as "attractive" but with girls it seemed that the slim girls were liked by some and the curvy girls by others, height seemed less important, strength too, breast size is really not that important, certainly it never seemed so in the UK, and so on. I have never been made to feel uncomfortable about my body by anyone, so why is there this great need to underline how important naturism is to give women that confidence boost. It does of course do that and some women of course do carry concerns, but why do we imagine it is so much more than men do? I would love to lose some of my body fat, but that is my want and it is more about health than a need to be approved of. Why is there such a great need for women to be told that they are alright, when we don't consider doing that for men? I don't enjoy naturism because it gives me confidence to think I am fine as I am, it doesn't change my want to be fitter, I enjoy it because it gives me joy. It doesn't really change my view of whether or not I would like to lose a bit of weight.
Yes naturism helps, there is no doubt about that, but why is it only applauded that it helps women? And it isn't just about body issues either. There are men you are looking for friends, who are shy, who want to be welcomed into the nurturing and respectful world of naturism, who don't just want to be told that they are OK but are looking to naturism to make friends and have company, because naturism is (or at least should be) an environment where people find friends, find respect and find that they fit in.
I think what I find sad is that we are failing to see that for men. We love stating how wonderful it is for women, yet don't say it for men at all, and seldom say it about families either. Naturism has so much to offer to everyone, why do we only want to convince women of that?
at December 30, 2025 11:43 AM GMT 